Here’s a revolutionary parenting idea for you – put yourself first!
Seriously. You are the most important person in the family, and yet you continue to put yourself last on the list. Am I right?
But have you considered that by putting yourself last on the priority list, you’re telling your children that parents are the least important members of the family? That the children’s needs come before your own? That’s wrong on so many levels.
By putting yourself last, you’re indicating that your children are more important than you are. You’re also providing the blueprint for the parents your children will become.
Your children are likely to create the same type of family that you create. So, by putting yourself last, it’s likely that your children will grow up to make the same sacrifices for their children.
The other day I read an article about how a health care worker prescribes the same thing for each of her clients who are busy mums. Her prescription is to have between one and four hours each week, doing something they enjoy, away from work and away from home.
When her clients give her that incredulous look that says ‘You really just don’t get it, do you?’ she responds,
‘So, when did you become the least important person in your household?’
I like her style, and found myself talking to some other mums in the playground about the article. When I rolled out the ‘So, when did you become the least important person in your household?’ line, one mother didn’t miss a beat. She just snorted and said. ‘The moment my kids where born’.
I looked at her and asked her how much her kids needed her, and who would look after them if she weren’t able to do so. She ignored my question, and restated the fact that mothers become the bottom of the priority pile when their children are born. That’s just the way it is.
What do you think?
When your children were born you probably just got on with what needed to be done – nappies, housework, and paid work. Endlessly cleaning and tidying a house that never really looks clean or tidy.
Maybe you didn’t make a conscious decision to put your family first.
Or, maybe you expected that your days of putting yourself first, pampering yourself with facials, manicures, and nice clothes would disappear. Maybe you take it for granted that you will always put your family’s needs before your own.
But, do you think this is what the suffragettes fought for, all those years ago? Is this equality? You know it’s not.
What about you start doing things differently? You can start by just putting yourself first for at least some of the time, every week. You can start being the sort of Mum who proudly says, ‘This week I took time out for myself, and I’m going to keep doing it’.
You can become the sort of Mum who will confidently declare. ‘I am as important as anyone else in this house, and I am putting myself first’, in whatever form that takes.
You can practice revolutionary parenting.
Making this change is easy. All you need to do is:
- Pledge that you will put yourself first by claiming some time each week as your own
- Share this post with all the Mums you know, and encourage them to do the same – just use the buttons below
Don’t dream it, just do it.
Thank you!
You can help Mums realise that they are the most important people on the planet.
Want to be part of the revolution? Just pop your email in the box below, and you’ll receive free resources, along with tips and inspiration to make your life easier. I’ll talk to you soon.
